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You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.
 
Albert Einstein - German physicist (1879 - 1955)
It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer.
 
Albert Einstein - German physicist (1879 - 1955)
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
 
Philip Kindred Dick - American science fiction novelist and short story writer (1928 – 1982)
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.
 
Albert Einstein - German physicist (1879 - 1955)
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
 
Albert Einstein - German physicist (1879 - 1955)
 
 
   
     
   
     
   
     
   
     
   
     
   
     
   
     
   
     
     
   

Murphy's Law ("If anything can go wrong, it will") was born at Edwards Air Force Base in 1949 at North Base. It was named after Capt. Edward A. Murphy, an engineer working on Air Force Project MX981, (a project) designed to see how much sudden deceleration a person can stand in a crash. One day, after finding that a transducer was wired wrong, he cursed the technician responsible and said, "If there is any way to do it wrong, he'll find it". The contractor's project manager kept a list of "laws" and added this one, which he called Murphy's Law.

 
If anything can go wrong, it will.
Fools are much more ingenious than the precautions you can take to prevent them from harming.
The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on.
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.
Anything good is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
Enough research will tend to support your theory.
If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.
The experiment may be considered a success if no more than 50% of the observed measurements must be discarded to obtain a correspondence with the theory.
If enough data is collected, anything may be proven by statistical methods.
If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
Never replicate a successful experiment.
The other line moves faster.
When all else fails, read the instructions.
In order to get a loan you must first prove you don't need it.
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.
Technology is dominated by two types of people -- those who understand what they do not manage, and those who manage what they do not understand.
Work expands to fill the time available for its completion; the thing to be done swells in perceived importance and complexity in a direct ratio with the time to be spent in its completion.
In every hierarchy each employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence; every post tends to be filled by an employee incompetent to execute its duties. Corollaries:
   
1. Incompetence knows no barriers of time or place.
   
2. Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.
In any human enterprise, work seeks the lowest hierarchical level.
Never characterize the importance of a statement in advance.
Power wears out those who do not have it.
No man's life, liberty or property are safe while the legislature is in session.
Law of the Perversity of Nature: You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
   
Corollary: The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
   
Corollary: At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer.
Men and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Everything takes longer than you think.
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
Super-competence is more objectionable than incompetence.
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
In America, it's not how much an item costs, it's how much you save.
Ginsberg's Theorem (Generalized Laws of Thermodynamics):
   
1. You can't win.
   
   
2. You can't break even.
   
   
3. You can't even quit the game.
   
Freeman's Commentary on Ginberg's Theorem: Every major philosophy that attempts to make life seem meaningful is based on the negation of one part of Ginsberg's Theorem. To wit:
   
1. Capitalism is based on the assumption that you can win.
 
   
2. Socialism is based on the assumption that you can break even.
 
   
3. Mysticism is based on the assumption that you can quit the game.
 
Anything that begins well ends badly. Anything that begins badly ends worse.
Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger can.
Every revolutionary idea evokes three stages of reaction. They may be summed up by the three phrases:
   
1. "It is completely impossible -- don't waste my time."
   
2. "It is possible, but it is not worth doing."
   
3. "I said it was a good idea all along."
     
Murphy's love laws
The probability of a young man meeting a desirable and receptive young female increases by pyramidal progression when he is already in the company of
   
1. a date
   
2. his wife
   
3. a better looking and richer male friend.
It's always easier to get a partner if you already have one.
Beauty times brains equals a constant.
Nothing improves with age.
A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he couldn't.
Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs.